Reports confirm that every single adult who could be accurately described as young fit comfortably inside the van they borrowed to move out of Marin County. “It was just one of those incredible moments where everything worked out,” said Cutler Danton, 26, who organized the evacuation. “We even had a couple of extra seats, so we were able to spread out a bit.”

Neither the move or the small size of the group came as a surprise to local experts, none of whom could think of one reason why anyone in the prime of their life would live here. “It’s a great place to be born and raised, or to age and die," said sociologist Harry Fife. "But Marin is not a good fit for anyone outside those two life stages.” Young adults in the area face a gauntlet of challenges, including high housing costs and terrible career prospects, he said, but none greater than boredom. “For this cohort, Marin is what’s known as a ‘fun desert,’” he added. 

Marin’s lopsided age demographics are extreme, but ultimately of little concern, county officials say. “We typically see residents leave for college 'forever' at the age of 18, but by their mid-thirties they come crawling back, often pregnant and practically begging for help with a down payment,” they said. “In the meantime, it’s nice and quiet.” Which is why no one seemed the least bit worried about losing the last handful of twenty-somethings in the county. “We were planning on relocating them anyway,” officials added.